The Mansion
by Kitina ValentineKit
Summary: I threw a bunch of characters from pokemon, digimon, and x-men into a mansion and locked them in I'm making fun of most of them here, please don't take it personaly!


This story is about a bunch of crazy people locked in a mansion, and one not crazy person, who gets locked in there, too. I used cartoon characters from different shows. I don't know much about them, so I'm sorry if I get anything wrong. Please send me feedback, I beg you, compliments, flames, ANYTHING.  
  
*Note: I'm making fun of most of the characters in this story. Don't take it personally  
  
Rating: G  
  
Type: Definitely a comedy.  
  
Characters:  
  
Non Cartoon:  
  
Haley (Caitlin)  
  
Kitty#3 (me)  
  
Kitty#1 (new girl)  
  
1 Counselor  
  
2 Narrator  
  
X-men:  
  
Scott  
  
Storm  
  
Jean  
  
Kurt  
  
Spike  
  
Kitty#2  
  
Logan  
  
Digimon/Pokemon:  
  
Matt  
  
Mimi  
  
Tai  
  
Ash  
  
Misty  
  
Brock  
  
Joe  
  
Disclamer: Roses are red, Violets are not. I don't own the characters, but I do own the plot. (I also own the 'non-cartoon' characters.)  
  
*************************  
  
Kitty walked up the stairs, to a huge wooden door that led to the giant, spooky looking mansion. Rain was pouring down, she was soaked and cold, and tired, and she officially hated her step-dad. The first thing he did after he and her mom got married was to ship her off to boarding school.  
  
Kitty looked around for a doorbell, but found none, so she shrugged and knocked on the door. To her surprise, the door opened all by its self. She walked in slowly, and the door slammed shut behind her. She now stood in what appeared to be a perfectly normal, cozy living room, except for the fact that it was huge. She heard voices from the other room, and followed them into a giant kitchen.  
  
Kurt: I'm telling you, Batman is way cooler.  
  
Spike: No way, dude, Superman could whip his butt.  
  
Kurt: Na uh  
  
Spike: Ya huh  
  
Kurt: Na uh  
  
Spike: Ya huh  
  
Kurt: Na uh  
  
Spike: Ya huh  
  
Kurt: Ya huh  
  
Spike: Na uh  
  
Kurt: Yah huh  
  
Spike: Na huh  
  
Kitty: Um, hello?  
  
Kurt: Dude, who are you?  
  
Kitty: Uh, I'm Kitty  
  
Spike: Really?  
  
Kitty: Yah  
  
Kurt: You look different  
  
Kitty: I do?  
  
::Kitty#2 walks in::  
  
Kitty#2: Huh?  
  
Kurt: Huh?  
  
Spike: Huh?  
  
Kitty#1: Huh?  
  
Kurt: Aren't you Kitty?  
  
Kitty#2: Yea  
  
::Spike points at Kitty#1::  
  
Spike: Then who are you?  
  
Kitty#1: I'm Kitty  
  
Kurt: huh?  
  
Spike: Are you sure?  
  
Kitty#1: Um, yah.  
  
Kurt: So you're not like an evil alien robot, or anything, right?  
  
Kitty#1: Huh?  
  
Kitty#2: You're not Kitty, I'm Kitty  
  
Kitty#1: No, I'm Kitty  
  
Kitty#2: I am like, so totally Kitty  
  
:: Kitty#3 walks in ::  
  
Kitty#3: Did somebody call me?  
  
Everyone: no  
  
Kitty#1: Who is she?  
  
Kitty#3: I'm Kitty  
  
Kitty#1: Wha?  
  
Kitty#2: NO, I AM KITTY, YOU IDIOT!  
  
Kitty#3: Well I'm Kitty, too  
  
Spike: Actually, you're kitty three  
  
Kitty#3: Oh  
  
All: …  
  
Kitty#3: Why do I have to be Kitty three?  
  
Spike: Dunno  
  
:: Scott walks in, looking sad ::  
  
Scott: Have any of you seen Jean?  
  
Everybody: No  
  
:: Scott looks sad ::  
  
Spike: Dude, I just spent the last week running from her, why are you looking for her?  
  
Scott in sad voice: I'm trying to stalk her, but I keep losing her :: Snif ::  
  
?: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
  
:: Brock walks into the room ::  
  
Brock: you will never be as great a stalker as I am! MWAHAHAH— oh, pretty ladies.  
  
Brock to Kitty#1, 2, and 3: Can I get you something? A drink? Some food? My Phone number?  
  
Kitty1, 2, and 3: No  
  
Brock: I'll give you a special offer: all three, for the low price of $0.00  
  
Kitty#3: How 'bout you get lost?  
  
Brock: Wanna go out on a date?  
  
3 Kitty#3: GET LOST, YOU LITTLE * beep * BEFORE I THROW YOU OUT THE * beep * WINDOW!  
  
4 Kitty#3: AND STOP SAYING * beep *, BECAUSE I WAS NOT EVEN SWEARING!  
  
:: Kurt, Scott, and the narrator start sulking ::  
  
:: Logan comes flying out of nowhere, trying to land on and kill Scott ::  
  
:: Scott steps to the side, and Logan goes * splat * right where he used to be ::  
  
:: Scott continues sulking ::  
  
Logan: Shoot, I missed  
  
:: Scott leaves to find Jean, and Brock leaves to make a plan to get a girl to go out with him ::  
  
Kurt: Logan, why are you wearing Storm's lipstick?  
  
Logan: Um, uh gotta go!  
  
:: Logan runs out the door ::  
  
:: Storm walks in ::  
  
Storm: What's up with her?  
  
:: Points at Kitty#1, who is huddled in a corner, looking scared, muttering "I hate my step dad, I hate my step dad" ::  
  
Kitty#2: She's new  
  
Storm: Oh  
  
Kurt: Hey Storm?  
  
Storm: Yea?  
  
Kurt: Why is Logan wearing your lipstick?  
  
Storm: Um, I, uh, gotta go  
  
* GONG * * GONG *  
  
:: Everyone groans ::  
  
Kitty#1: What?  
  
Storm: It's counseling time  
  
Kitty#1: Huh?  
  
***********************  
  
:: Everyone sits in a circle around the Counselor ::  
  
:: Logan is about to sit down next to Jean, but Scott runs and gets there first ::  
  
Logan: Grrr  
  
:: Scott sticks out his tongue ::  
  
:: Logan sits next to Storm instead ::  
  
Counselor: Good afternoon, everybody  
  
Everyone, in a very bored voice: Good afternoon Counselor  
  
Counselor: I see we have a new member today  
  
:: Everyone looks at Kitty#1 ::  
  
Counselor: So, what's your name?  
  
Kitty#1: Kitty  
  
Tai: Huh? I thought they were Kitty  
  
:: Points at Kitty#2 and 3 ::  
  
Ash: Yea, what's up with that?  
  
:: Misty hits him on the head with a frying pan ::  
  
Misty: Shut up, you idiot  
  
Ash: Sorry  
  
Kitty#2: I'M Kitty  
  
Mimi: That is like so, totally awesome  
  
5 Everyone: Shutup  
  
Joe: Were all gonna die!  
  
:: Mimi starts to cry ::  
  
Counselor: Now, now, let's not get violent, we need to release our negative energy. Everyone take a deep breath, and let it out slowly  
  
:: Counselor starts meditating ::  
  
:: Everyone but Matt and Joe Take breaths and look bored ::  
  
:: Joe starts taking huge breaths really fast ::  
  
:: Matt sucks on a lollipop and looks bored ::  
  
Counselor: Matt, will you cooperate?  
  
Matt: No  
  
:: Joe is still breathing really hard ::  
  
Counselor: Please?  
  
Matt: No  
  
Counselor: Why not?  
  
Matt: I love my anger  
  
Counselor: That's very sweet, Matt, But I really think you should cooperate  
  
Haley: Fight fight fight fightfightfightfightfight  
  
Counselor: Haley-  
  
Haley: I hate my name  
  
Counselor: Why is that, Haley  
  
Haley: It's a boy's name  
  
Counselor No, it's not  
  
Haley: Yes, it is  
  
:: Joe starts hyperventilating ::  
  
Counselor No, it's not  
  
Haley: Yes, it is  
  
Counselor No, it's not  
  
Haley: Yes, it is  
  
Counselor No, it's not  
  
Haley: Yes, it is  
  
Counselor No, it's not  
  
Haley: Yes, it is  
  
Counselor No, it's not  
  
Haley: Yes, it is  
  
Everybody: HALEY IS NOT A BOY'S NAME!  
  
:: Joe passes out ::  
  
Tai: Dude, Joe's dead  
  
Kitty#3: Yay!  
  
Counselor: That wasn't very nice  
  
Haley: No?  
  
Jean: He' s still alive  
  
Everyone: Awwww…  
  
Ash: Uh, shouldn't we like, give him CPR or something?  
  
Tai: How do you spell CPR?  
  
Storm: c-p-r  
  
Tai: No, I mean like, how do you SPELL it, not say it  
  
Storm: C-P-R!  
  
Tai: Weird  
  
Misty: Who knows CPR?  
  
:: Everyone looks at Jean ::  
  
Jean: I am not giving him CPR  
  
Joe: Please?  
  
:: Jean slaps him ::  
  
Jean: Pervert  
  
Kurt: Ya know what's really cool?  
  
Scott (half asleep): Huh?  
  
Kurt: I could zap myself into the kitchen right now, and eat all the food I wanted to  
  
Matt: I hate you  
  
Counselor: That wasn't a very nice thing to-  
  
Kurt: Dude, why?  
  
Matt (whines): Because, I wanna have super-duper mutant powers  
  
Kurt: Ha ha  
  
Counselor: We all have a little mutant inside of us. In fact, your homework for tonight is to write down what one of your fellow student's inner mutant ability is.  
  
:: Everyone groans ::  
  
Counselor: Tomorrow, we will make a chart out of your answers.  
  
Matt: Can we leave now?  
  
Counselor: Say 'May we leave,' it's more polite  
  
Matt: No  
  
Counselor: Fine. Leave.  
  
Everyone: Yay!  
  
*************************  
  
##  
  
:: Kitty#1 walks up to a door with the number 3 carved into it. Apparently, this was where she was supposed to sleep ::  
  
:: Kitty#1 knocks on the door ::  
  
Storm: Come in!  
  
:: Kitty#1 opens the door, to find Matt hunched in a corner, sucking on his lollipop and glaring at her. Kurt playing with hot wheels toy cars. Tai playing with Barbie's. Mimi dancing around the room, occasionally tripping over various objects and storm holding a little snow globe two inches away from her face and staring at it like it was the most interesting thing in the world ::  
  
Storm (still staring at snow globe): Whoa…  
  
Matt: Ya know what's scary?  
  
Kitty#1 decided not to answer that question  
  
Matt: Storm's been staring at that thing for two hours now, and she hasn't blinked  
  
Tai: Check this out  
  
:: Holds up a naked Barbie ::  
  
Kitty#1: pervert  
  
Kurt: Vroom! Vroom!  
  
Mimi: Matt, can I have a sucker?  
  
:: Mimi bats her eyelids at Matt ::  
  
Narrator: Why do they call it "batting" your eyelashes? I mean, what does it have to do with bats?  
  
Everyone: …  
  
Matt: Noobody cares  
  
Mimi: Can I?  
  
Matt: No  
  
Mimi: Pleeeease?  
  
Matt: No  
  
Mimi: Awwww…  
  
:: Kurt gets bored of Hot wheels, and steals Storm's snow globe ::  
  
:: Storm starts to cry ::  
  
:: Kurt notices Kitty#1 pulling out a pencil and a piece of paper ::  
  
Kurt: Whatcha doing?  
  
Kitty#1: My homework  
  
:: Everyone stops what they're doing and stares at her ::  
  
Storm: You mean you're doing you homework the day before it's due?  
  
Kitty#1: Uh huh  
  
Tai: Dude  
  
Mimi: It's, it's like :: shutter :: grownup like  
  
Kitty#1: Ookay then, maybe I'll just go to bed now…  
  
  
  
****************************  
  
6 Counselor: There now, were all done putting our chart together  
  
6.1 Super-Duper mutant abilities  
  
  
  
Ash: Has the ability to be stupid and piss everyone off without even trying. (especially Misty)  
  
Brock: Has the ability to make every girl hate him.  
  
Haley: Has the ability to make no one care what her ability is.  
  
Jean: Has the ability to fly  
  
Joe: Has the ability to be a wuss  
  
7 Kitty#1: Has the ability to steal peoples names  
  
Kitty#2: Has the ability to be annoying  
  
Kitty#3: Has the ability to attract Brock (Not that it's very hard)  
  
8  
  
Kurt: Has the ability to look weird  
  
Logan: Has the ability to wear Storms lipstick  
  
Matt: Has the ability to be anti-social  
  
Mimi: Has the ability to be even more annoying than Kitty#2  
  
Misty: Has the ability to be a control freak  
  
Scott: Has the ability to look cool  
  
Spike: Has the ability to be related to Storm and be immature  
  
Storm: Has the ability to love cold  
  
Tai: Has the ability to be the only person alive, who actually doesn't have a brain  
  
***********************  
  
9 Haley: Help!  
  
10 Kitty#3: Huh?  
  
Haley: Help  
  
11 Kitty#3: Where are you?  
  
Haley: Over here  
  
:: Kitty#3 opened the freezer, finding Haley smushed inside of it ::  
  
Kitty#3: Haley, what are you doing in the freezer?  
  
Haley: I was hot  
  
:: Kitty#3 rolls her eyes and leaves to make a sandwich, Haley skips off to her room ::  
  
:: Brock comes out of his hiding place ::  
  
Brock: I will now attempt to gain Kitty's trust, by copying her best friend's actions  
  
:: Brock squeezed into the freezer ::  
  
:: Kitty#3 comes back ::  
  
Brock: Help!  
  
Kitty#3: Haley, what are you doing in the freezer, again?  
  
:: Kitty#3 opens the freezer door ::  
  
Brock: Hi  
  
:: Kitty#3 slams the door and leaves ::  
  
Brock: Wait, please, heeeeeeeelp!  
  
**********************  
  
##  
  
:: Jean is walking through the indoor park, and Scott is sneaking from bush to bush behind her ::  
  
Jean: Hi Scott!  
  
Scott: Oh! Hi Jean! I didn't know you were here  
  
Jean: Scott, are you stalking me?  
  
Scott: Shoot  
  
Jean: Scott, why are you stalking me?  
  
Scott: I dunno, it seemed like a good idea when I though it up  
  
Jean: Oh  
  
Both: …  
  
Jean: Sooooo… wanna come feed the fish?  
  
Scott: Sure!  
  
:: Logan watched Jean and Scott through pieces of bread into the fish pond. He stood on the balcony, a vine in his hands ::  
  
Logan: I will now swoop down on Scott and finish him of, once and for all!  
  
:: Logan jumps of the balcony ::  
  
:: The vine breaks ::  
  
Logan: Ow  
  
Jean: Did you hear something?  
  
Scott: Yea  
  
Jean: What did you hear?  
  
Scott: You said 'did you hear something?'  
  
Jean: And…  
  
Scott: That's what I heard  
  
Jean: Oh  
  
….  
  
Jean: I don't remember there being a door there  
  
Scott: Nether do I  
  
Jean: Let's see what's in it  
  
Scott: Ok  
  
:: They go into the room ::  
  
:: It's pitch black ::  
  
Scott: Huh?  
  
:: A big TV screen lights up ::  
  
TV: And now, for our feature presentation… Barney the movie!  
  
Scott and Jean: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
:: They try to get out, but the door is locked ::  
  
Scott and Jean: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*************************  
  
:: Kitty#1 walked into the living room, to find everyone but Scott and Jean running around the room, jumping up and down, and bouncing off the walls ::  
  
Kitty#1: THAT'S IT! WHOEVER IS SUPPLING THESE PEOPLE WITH HAPPYPILLS, ETHER CUT THEM OFF RIGHT NOW, OR SHARE THEM WITH ME!!!  
  
:: Everyone stares ::  
  
Brock: I'm so sorry, you're absolutely right! How bou-  
  
Kitty#1: SHUTUP!  
  
:: Brock sulks away ::  
  
Everyone: ….  
  
Everyone: ….  
  
Everyone: ….  
  
Kurt: I'm bored  
  
Ash: Me to  
  
:: Misty hits Ash on the head with a frying pan ::  
  
:: Kitty#1 rolls her eyes and sits on the couch ::  
  
Spike: I know! Lets play truth or dare!  
  
Kurt: Yea!  
  
Kitty#1: I don't know…  
  
Kurt: C'mon, don't be a wuss  
  
Kitty#1: Fine, but I get to go first.  
  
Kurt: Fine  
  
Kitty#1: Kurt, I dare you to :: Whispers in his ear :: Steal one of Matt's lollipops  
  
:: Kurt gasps ::  
  
Kurt: how am I supposed to do that?  
  
Kitty#1: :: shrugs :: That's not my problem  
  
:: Kurt Glares ::  
  
Kurt: I'm gonna go think about this  
  
:: Walks off into the hall ::  
  
***********************  
  
:: Kurt stood on the balcony above Matt and the others. He had the perfect plan. Matt had just been dared to make out with Kitty#3 for a minute, and Kurt planed on taking advantage of his 'distraction' ::  
  
:: Kurt pulls out a fishing rod, and sticks a piece of gum on it. He lowers it down, trying to get one of the lollipops stuck to it ::  
  
:: The other people stare ::  
  
Haley: Times up!  
  
:: Kitty#3 pulls away, getting her hair stuck on the gum ::  
  
Kurt: That's not good  
  
:: Kitty#3 starts to walk away, when she notices the gum ::  
  
:: Kurt covers up his ears ::  
  
:: Kitty#3 screams ::  
  
Kitty#2: Like, oh my gosh, that is like so totally not awesome  
  
Kitty#3: KURT!! I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS, YOU HEAR ME? I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS!  
  
:: Haley starts dragging her away ::  
  
Kitty#3: I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS! THIS MEANS WAR!  
  
************************************  
  
:: Jean and Scott smash through the wall with a giant sludge hammer ::  
  
Brock (weakly): Help  
  
Jean: Did you hear something?  
  
Scott: Yea  
  
Jean: What did you hear?  
  
Scott: You said 'did you hear something?'  
  
Jean: And…  
  
Scott: That's what I heard  
  
Jean: Oh, never mind  
  
Brock: Help  
  
Jean: See, I did hear something  
  
:: Jean opens the freezer ::  
  
:: Brock falls out, covered with icicles ::  
  
Brock: Will you marry me?  
  
:: Jean is about to shove Brock back in the freezer when Storm comes in ::  
  
Storm: Snow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Brock: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
:: Storm starts chasing Brock around the kitchen ::  
  
:: Storm and Brock run in to Scott ::  
  
:: Logan jumps from nowhere, trying to land on top of  
  
Scott, but lands on top of Storm instead ::  
  
:: Storm tries to throw a piece of food at Logan, but misses and hits Kurt instead ::  
  
Kurt: FOOD FIGHT!  
  
:: Kurt mauls Mat and steals one of his lollypops ::  
  
:: Kitty#3 swoops down on him and steals it ::  
  
:: Kurt starts crying ::  
  
Haley: Kitty! What out for that-  
  
:: Kitty#3 smacks into a tree ::  
  
Ash: We're did that come from?  
  
:: Misty smacks Ash over the head 


End file.
